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♪ ♪
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(no voice)
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♪ I bet we've been together
for a million years ♪
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♪ And I bet we'll be together
for a million more ♪
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♪ Oh, it's like
I started breathing ♪
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♪ On the night we kissed ♪
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♪ And I can't remember
what I ever did before ♪
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♪ What would we do, baby,
without us? ♪
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♪ What would we do, baby,
without us? ♪
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♪ And there ain't no nothing we
can't love each other through ♪
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♪ What would we do, baby,
without us? ♪
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Ripped By mstoll
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Okay, now, here's what we do.
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Everyone take
his own fortune cookie.
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And then we'll break our cookies
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and we'll read
our fortunes aloud.
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Now, Andy, be very careful
how you open that cookie.
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There's an old Oriental proverb
that says,
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"If you tear your fortune,
you'll have bad luck."
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Here, now, watch.
Watch this.
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This is...
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That's real good, Dad.
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What's it say?
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"Stop telling people...
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how to open fortune cookies."
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Well, I got my usual one.
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"Fame, fortune and riches
are yours for the asking...
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Alex."
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Here goes mine.
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"Alex, no more personalized
fortunes until you pay up.
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Signed Mr. Wong."
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Uh, what does...
what does yours say, Andy?
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I ate mine.
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JENNIFER:
Oh, come on, Andy.
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We'll go find you
another fortune.
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Okay.
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- Hi.
- STEVEN: Well, hi!
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Hello, everybody.
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Well, I hope you haven't come
for dinner, Skip.
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- We're finished.
- Oh, no, no, no.
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Tonight's meat loaf
surprise night at my house.
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Old Handelman tradition.
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Just a regular meat loaf
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with many different
foreign coins hidden in it.
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Sounds delicious.
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Skippy, can I please
tell them my news now?
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Of course. I was just
getting them warmed up.
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Okay. I...
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Everybody, I did something today
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that I never thought
I'd do before.
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You wore plaids with checks?
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No. Something at school.
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- You wrote in pen.
- Oh!
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MALLORY:
No.
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I have decided to run
for school president.
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- Great idea!
- ELYSE: Oh, that's terrific!
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- Good, honey.
- Thank you.
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Wow! Tell me, Mal,
how do they decide
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who's going to run
for president of Grant?
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I mean, I mean, what do you...
what do you need
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to qualify for that,
a "D" average and a pulse?
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They're not really strict
about the "D" average.
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Honey, this is wonderful,
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but I got to admit
I'm a little surprised.
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You've never shown any interest
in politics before.
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Yeah, I know...
I don't know.
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It just came to me
out of nowhere.
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I was sitting
with a bunch of my friends,
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and they said,
"Why don't you run?"
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And I said, "Are you kidding?"
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And then I thought,
"Huh, I don't know.
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It could be fun.
Sounds like a neat job."
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So I said, "What the heck,"
you know?
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(Steven chuckles)
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That's pretty much
the way Reagan decided to run.
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Let me tell you one thing, Mal:
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Don't take any, uh, political
wisdom from Mom and Dad.
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What is that supposed to mean?
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Let's face it...
politically speaking,
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you two are the kiss of death.
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I mean, just look at the
candidates you supported.
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Uh, McGovern, Humphrey...
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uh, Mr. Excitement himself,
Walter Mondale.
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Those names sound so familiar.
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Do they go to Grant?
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Look, Alex,
we don't get involved
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in the campaigns just to win.
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We do it because we feel deeply
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about certain political or...
or moral issues.
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It would be nice
to win occasionally.
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Well, then, you should work
on Mallory's campaign,
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'cause she's going to win.
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Everybody at school loves her.
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She's... really popular.
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Skippy's my campaign manager.
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(Alex chuckles)
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Well... well, uh, no, you're...
you're well on your way.
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I just thought Skippy could, uh,
help me keep in touch
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with all the people at Grant
that nobody talks to.
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I'm close with them.
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MALLORY:
Wait, wait.
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Listen... listen to my fortune.
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"Good fortune
will soon smile on you."
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It's good luck for the campaign.
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What does yours say, Skippy?
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"You have 15 minutes to live."
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How does this sound
for a campaign slogan?
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- "Vote for Mallory."
- Um...
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We need something more direct,
livelier.
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How about just, "Vote"?
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That's-that's good, Skippy,
but it doesn't say for who.
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Well, you could stand
next to the sign.
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But I can't be
everywhere at once.
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Okay. Maybe that's it.
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"Vote for Mallory.
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She can't be
everywhere at once."
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- Hi.
- Hi.
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Mallory, congratulations.
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I heard you're running
for president of Grant.
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- That's great.
- Thanks.
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- Too bad I can't vote for you.
- Aw.
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What do you mean?
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Skippy, only students at Grant
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can vote in this election.
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Oh, great.
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Well, there goes
my grandma's vote.
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What's this, Mal,
material for your campaign?
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Yes, Alex.
Don't look at it.
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- You'll just make fun of it.
- ALEX: No!
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No, not at all.
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No, I'm glad
you're getting involved.
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I'm interested.
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What, uh... what's your
campaign platform?
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What's my platform, Skippy?
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We're trying to run
a campaign here.
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We don't have time
to build a platform.
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(doorbell rings)
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I'll get it.
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- Hi, Amy.
- Hi, Alex.
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Uh, this is Amy Sussman,
Skippy's girlfriend.
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- Amy, this is Lauren.
- Hi.
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- Hi. How you doing?
- AMY: Sorry I'm late, guys.
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Amy is my campaign treasurer.
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- Hey, gang!
- Well, well, it looks like
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we walked in on this big,
executive campaign meeting.
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Yeah. Oh, you know, Mal,
uh, maybe I can help you.
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Uh, I don't want to brag, but
I-I was president in college.
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Really, Dad?
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You were president
of your school?
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Well, not exactly
the entire school.
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I was, uh, president
of the South Campus
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Aluminum Can Recycling Club.
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(sighs)
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And a damn fine one, too.
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Well, uh...
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Excuse me, but if...
but if Mallory's going to win,
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she's going to need
something more
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than a "give a hoot,
don't pollute" platform.
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Oh, I like that.
Can we use it, Mr. Keaton?
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- Be my guest, Skip.
- Well, good-bye.
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We're going to go
pick Andy up at school.
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Would you mind
dropping me off at campus?
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- Oh, yeah.
- Oh, no, not at all, Lauren.
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It'll give me time to, uh,
tell you a little bit about
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the work I did as president
of the recycling club.
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Steven, I've heard that story
a million times.
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Sit in the back, Elyse.
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You know, I had a little slogan,
and I had a little magnet...
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I think the first thing
we need is a, uh...
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a good campaign strategy.
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Any ideas?
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I have a few ideas.
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But first, I have a question.
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What exactly
is a campaign strategy?
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Well, a campaign strategy
is a...
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(softly):
Alex...
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I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
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It's your campaign.
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You guys run with it.
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Go ahead, Mal.
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Uh... a campaign strategy, huh?
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What's something
that you really believe in?
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Like, uh, more study hours,
hard work, good grades.
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No, not those.
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Well, what, then?
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Well, I guess I feel
that the students
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should have more of a say
in what goes on at Grant.
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Like, remember last year,
out of the blue,
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all of a sudden, they took out
the diet soda machine?
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And-and I said,
"This is wrong."
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A lot of people...
a lot of people agreed.
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There you go, Mal.
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There you go. That's good.
That's good.
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That's something the students
can get behind.
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Diet soda?
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Well, it's not just
diet soda, Mal.
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It's-it's a vision
that you stand for,
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uh, to make life easier
and more pleasurable for...
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weight-conscious students.
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"Vote for Mal, go low-cal."
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Look, Alex, I don't know if
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I can get the soda machine
put back in.
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And I don't want to make
promises I can't keep.
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Well, you have no place
in politics.
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Well, I'll tell you...
I'd vote for someone
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who could get
that soda machine back.
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There you go, Mal.
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There you go.
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I can feel the groundswell
starting.
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SKIPPY:
I'll tell you something else.
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I miss the low-fat
chocolate milk
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with the twisty straws.
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Who doesn't? Who doesn't?
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I can feel it, Mal.
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You're going to win this thing.
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I do have another idea
about changing
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the color of the drapes
in the student center.
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I like it. It's hip.
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It's fresh.
It's contemporary.
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It's what the people want.
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I'm telling you, Mal, there's
only one ingredient missing here
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for a winning campaign.
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Let's see, we've got diet soda,
chocolate milk and drapes.
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What's she missing?
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00:08:27,974 --> 00:08:29,839
Oh, Alex, I don't know.
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- I'm nervous about this.
- Oh, come on, Mal.
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You've got nothing
to worry about.
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It's the first day
on the campaign trail.
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Let's go out there
and let's get 'em, huh?
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Remember our platform?
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"Confidence, diet soda
and new drapes."
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All right, let's go.
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(Alex clears throat)
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Hi there. Hello.
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Hi. Uh, I'd like you
to meet Mallory Keaton,
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00:08:46,759 --> 00:08:49,694
uh, candidate for
student government president.
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- Hi.
- Hi.
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How-how... how's your sandwich?
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Not bad.
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MALLORY:
Oh.
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It looks a little dry.
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I bet you could use a diet soda
to go with that.
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00:09:03,376 --> 00:09:05,571
I hate diet soda.
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00:09:05,711 --> 00:09:07,144
MALLORY (quietly):
What do I do?
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- Try the drapes,
try the drapes. - Oh.
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Don't you think we could use
some new drapes in here?
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I mean, these are so ugly.
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My mother made those drapes.
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Alex, why does it
have to be so complicated?
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00:09:24,931 --> 00:09:26,489
Why can't I just put up posters,
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pass out buttons
and take my chances?
252
00:09:28,367 --> 00:09:29,493
Because you want to win, okay?
253
00:09:29,635 --> 00:09:31,660
And you're going to win.
Trust me. Trust me.
254
00:09:31,804 --> 00:09:33,169
I've got every detail
worked out.
255
00:09:33,306 --> 00:09:35,171
(coughs loudly)
256
00:09:35,308 --> 00:09:37,173
Look, honey.
It's Mallory Keaton,
257
00:09:37,310 --> 00:09:39,437
our choice for
student government president.
258
00:09:39,579 --> 00:09:43,515
She looks just like she does
on these buttons.
259
00:09:43,649 --> 00:09:45,640
And these posters.
260
00:09:48,454 --> 00:09:50,354
Mallory, is it true
that you're planning on getting
261
00:09:50,489 --> 00:09:52,855
a new soda machine
for the snack bar?
262
00:09:52,992 --> 00:09:56,325
And low-fat chocolate milk
with twisty straws?
263
00:09:56,462 --> 00:09:58,123
Well, I was thinking about it.
264
00:09:58,264 --> 00:09:59,993
Alex, what's going on?
265
00:10:00,132 --> 00:10:02,623
(whispering):
Mallory, it's me, Skippy.
266
00:10:04,870 --> 00:10:06,462
(door opens)
267
00:10:06,606 --> 00:10:08,597
Hey!
268
00:10:13,212 --> 00:10:17,205
Where is a guy supposed to get
a diet soda around this place?
269
00:10:20,519 --> 00:10:23,488
And a room with
some decent drapes?
270
00:10:23,623 --> 00:10:28,026
Well... you raise a fine point,
young man.
271
00:10:28,160 --> 00:10:30,253
You know... you know,
Grant College
272
00:10:30,396 --> 00:10:33,058
is in desperate need
of new, fresh leadership.
273
00:10:33,199 --> 00:10:34,962
Hey, you are damn right,
you know,
274
00:10:35,101 --> 00:10:38,229
and I don't even
go to school here.
275
00:10:38,371 --> 00:10:40,464
Alex, what's going on?
276
00:10:40,606 --> 00:10:41,800
Hey, Mal, it's me, Nick.
277
00:10:41,941 --> 00:10:44,603
(clears throat)
278
00:10:44,744 --> 00:10:46,473
Excuse me, did you say something
about a soda machine?
279
00:10:46,612 --> 00:10:47,772
Yes, she did.
Yes, she did.
280
00:10:47,913 --> 00:10:49,312
Uh, have you seen
Mallory's position paper?
281
00:10:49,448 --> 00:10:51,678
Alex, I haven't seen
my position paper.
282
00:10:51,817 --> 00:10:53,216
Look at this: "If elected,
283
00:10:53,352 --> 00:10:55,946
Mallory Keaton promises
to put an end to pop quizzes."
284
00:10:56,088 --> 00:10:57,953
(students murmuring)
285
00:10:58,090 --> 00:10:59,079
- What?
- If you like that...
286
00:10:59,225 --> 00:11:00,749
if you like that,
try number three.
287
00:11:00,893 --> 00:11:03,623
"Frequent flyer bonus miles
for commuting students."
288
00:11:03,763 --> 00:11:05,287
(students whoop, murmur)
289
00:11:05,431 --> 00:11:07,194
We can't do that.
290
00:11:07,333 --> 00:11:08,630
Oh, come on,
look at these people.
291
00:11:08,768 --> 00:11:10,326
They're delirious.
They'll do anything for you.
292
00:11:10,469 --> 00:11:11,731
Just go with it.
Go with it.
293
00:11:11,871 --> 00:11:13,771
"Free trips to Hawaii
for all students
294
00:11:13,906 --> 00:11:15,965
with passing grades
in two or more subjects!"
295
00:11:16,108 --> 00:11:17,075
(students exclaim loudly)
296
00:11:17,209 --> 00:11:19,177
- Alex!
- Yeah!
297
00:11:19,311 --> 00:11:22,212
Don't worry about it!
The plane will be empty.
298
00:11:22,348 --> 00:11:24,748
STUDENTS (chanting):
Mallory! Mallory! Mallory!
299
00:11:24,884 --> 00:11:27,182
Mallory! Mallory!
Mallory...
300
00:11:30,489 --> 00:11:31,956
Hey! What have you got
there, Andy?
301
00:11:32,091 --> 00:11:34,616
A poster for Mallory's campaign.
302
00:11:34,760 --> 00:11:36,728
Alex asked me to hang it up
in the kitchen.
303
00:11:36,862 --> 00:11:39,854
Uh-huh, well,
what is it, uh...
304
00:11:44,070 --> 00:11:45,367
Well it's good to see
the campaign
305
00:11:45,504 --> 00:11:47,768
has brought out
Alex's sense of fairness.
306
00:11:47,907 --> 00:11:51,104
Yeah. Mallory wasn't even
on the first poster.
307
00:11:52,645 --> 00:11:54,545
- Hi, guys.
- ELYSE: Hi, honey.
308
00:11:54,680 --> 00:11:56,409
- Oh, did you, uh?
- I'm so t... Oh, great!
309
00:11:56,549 --> 00:11:58,176
He finally put my picture on it.
310
00:11:58,317 --> 00:11:59,409
Mm-hmm.
311
00:11:59,552 --> 00:12:00,746
Where have you been, honey?
312
00:12:00,886 --> 00:12:02,114
Oh, all over.
313
00:12:02,254 --> 00:12:05,121
Alex has the Keaton
campaign trail fully booked.
314
00:12:05,257 --> 00:12:07,521
I was over on campus
this morning
315
00:12:07,660 --> 00:12:10,561
passing out campaign buttons
to people in the infirmary.
316
00:12:10,696 --> 00:12:13,529
Alex said I should get them
in a weakened state.
317
00:12:13,666 --> 00:12:15,327
And then I was over
at the snack bar
318
00:12:15,468 --> 00:12:17,868
passing out little
mustard packets with
319
00:12:18,003 --> 00:12:20,938
"Let Mallory spice up your life"
printed on 'em.
320
00:12:21,073 --> 00:12:22,631
Oh, here are some extras.
Here you go.
321
00:12:22,775 --> 00:12:24,072
- Oh, boy.
- Thanks.
322
00:12:24,210 --> 00:12:27,111
Yeah. And then, uh, we finished
it off with a lengthy stint
323
00:12:27,246 --> 00:12:29,077
on the Keaton campaign truck.
324
00:12:29,215 --> 00:12:31,649
- The Keaton campaign truck?
- Mm-hmm.
325
00:12:31,784 --> 00:12:33,183
MAN (over loudspeaker):
Mallory Keaton for
326
00:12:33,319 --> 00:12:34,684
Grant College
student presidency.
327
00:12:34,820 --> 00:12:38,187
Mallory's campaign manager,
Alex P. Keaton!
328
00:12:38,324 --> 00:12:41,521
("The Stars and Stripes Forever"
plays, crowd cheering)
329
00:12:41,660 --> 00:12:43,252
I want to see it!
330
00:12:43,395 --> 00:12:45,090
I want to talk
through the microphone!
331
00:12:45,231 --> 00:12:47,256
Come on, Andy.
We'll go take a look.
332
00:12:47,399 --> 00:12:48,491
(door closes)
333
00:12:48,634 --> 00:12:49,931
Are you enjoying the campaign?
334
00:12:50,069 --> 00:12:51,969
It's tiring, but it's fun.
335
00:12:52,104 --> 00:12:53,401
I mean,
I've been speaking in public.
336
00:12:53,539 --> 00:12:54,733
I've met everyone on campus.
337
00:12:54,874 --> 00:12:56,705
And I've... I've had a chance
to really listen
338
00:12:56,842 --> 00:12:58,469
to people and find out
what they're thinking.
339
00:12:58,611 --> 00:12:59,873
What are they thinking?
340
00:13:00,012 --> 00:13:03,072
Well, some are thinking
about their future,
341
00:13:03,215 --> 00:13:04,705
and some are concerned
about academics,
342
00:13:04,850 --> 00:13:08,809
and some are just sort of
staring straight ahead.
343
00:13:08,954 --> 00:13:10,979
- Well, that sounds great.
- Yeah.
344
00:13:11,123 --> 00:13:12,556
It's a good experience for you.
345
00:13:12,691 --> 00:13:13,783
Well, I-I think it's nice.
346
00:13:13,926 --> 00:13:15,325
You know, it's a chance
for you and Alex
347
00:13:15,461 --> 00:13:16,689
- to get to work together again.
- Mm-hmm.
348
00:13:16,829 --> 00:13:19,161
I mean, you... you haven't
worked together since...
349
00:13:19,298 --> 00:13:21,858
well... well, since you
did that, uh...
350
00:13:22,001 --> 00:13:24,435
When did they work together,
Steven?
351
00:13:24,570 --> 00:13:25,662
Alex and Mal?
352
00:13:25,805 --> 00:13:27,238
Oh, well, uh, let's see.
353
00:13:27,373 --> 00:13:30,536
There was, um... let's see.
354
00:13:30,676 --> 00:13:33,042
There was, uh...
355
00:13:33,179 --> 00:13:36,046
So this is the first time
you've worked together, huh?
356
00:13:36,182 --> 00:13:38,673
Yeah. It's been great.
We're getting along really well.
357
00:13:38,818 --> 00:13:40,251
We haven't been fighting at all.
358
00:13:40,386 --> 00:13:41,614
Well, I think it's wonderful.
359
00:13:41,754 --> 00:13:42,846
I mean,
particularly knowing Alex,
360
00:13:42,988 --> 00:13:44,285
you'd think that he'd be,
you know...
361
00:13:44,423 --> 00:13:46,414
M-A-double L-O-R-Y.
362
00:13:46,559 --> 00:13:48,857
That spells "Mallory."
363
00:13:48,994 --> 00:13:50,985
...going overboard.
364
00:13:51,130 --> 00:13:52,859
Well, Mal, we've got that new
campaign poster.
365
00:13:52,998 --> 00:13:56,058
I think it's going to add a new
dimension to the campaign.
366
00:13:59,205 --> 00:14:01,173
MAN (over loudspeaker):
Mallory Keaton for Grant College
367
00:14:01,307 --> 00:14:03,138
student presidency.
368
00:14:03,275 --> 00:14:05,334
ANDREW (over loudspeaker):
If you don't vote for my sister,
369
00:14:05,477 --> 00:14:06,910
I won't vote for your sister.
370
00:14:08,113 --> 00:14:09,444
Hi, Mom and Dad.
371
00:14:09,582 --> 00:14:12,881
Come out and see.
I'm driving!
372
00:14:16,355 --> 00:14:19,813
(phone ringing)
373
00:14:22,061 --> 00:14:23,551
Keaton campaign headquarters.
374
00:14:23,696 --> 00:14:24,958
Uh, just a second.
375
00:14:25,097 --> 00:14:26,587
Uh, Alex, command post
number seven checking in.
376
00:14:26,732 --> 00:14:28,666
Yeah, hi,
command post number seven.
377
00:14:28,801 --> 00:14:31,031
Did you get those posters up
at Delaware Hall yet?
378
00:14:31,170 --> 00:14:33,900
Well... listen, Jennifer.
379
00:14:34,039 --> 00:14:37,372
I don't... I don't care
if you're tired.
380
00:14:37,509 --> 00:14:39,841
Okay, give me command post
number six, will you?
381
00:14:39,979 --> 00:14:41,241
Yeah, Andy... yeah, light a fire
382
00:14:41,380 --> 00:14:43,280
under your sister, will you?
383
00:14:43,415 --> 00:14:44,814
- Thanks.
- Uh-uh.
384
00:14:44,950 --> 00:14:48,044
Command post number six,
it's almost time for bed.
385
00:14:48,187 --> 00:14:50,052
Alex, Alex,
shouldn't I be doing something?
386
00:14:50,189 --> 00:14:52,623
- I mean, I am the candidate.
- Absolutely.
387
00:14:52,758 --> 00:14:55,750
Why don't you go over
your acceptance speech?
388
00:14:55,895 --> 00:14:58,056
Oh. "This is
truly a glorious day
389
00:14:58,197 --> 00:14:59,755
for freedom-loving people
everywhere."
390
00:14:59,899 --> 00:15:04,302
Alex, I only promised them a
soda machine, not a revolution.
391
00:15:04,436 --> 00:15:05,733
Could we tone it down?
392
00:15:05,871 --> 00:15:08,738
Yeah, absolutely.
Uh, Mom, um...
393
00:15:10,676 --> 00:15:13,201
"This is truly a glorious day
394
00:15:13,345 --> 00:15:16,712
for carbonated beverage-loving
people everywhere."
395
00:15:16,849 --> 00:15:18,441
Alex, if I'm elected president,
396
00:15:18,584 --> 00:15:21,052
I'm going to have to start
making some of my own decisions.
397
00:15:21,186 --> 00:15:23,245
Uh, what...
what do you mean, Mal?
398
00:15:24,757 --> 00:15:27,726
I'm saying things that would not
normally come out of my mouth.
399
00:15:27,860 --> 00:15:30,886
That's because they're coming
out of my mouth.
400
00:15:31,030 --> 00:15:33,464
Alex, I don't know
if I just want to be a puppet.
401
00:15:33,599 --> 00:15:37,262
Oh! Oh, suddenly puppet's not
good enough for you.
402
00:15:39,571 --> 00:15:41,368
It just doesn't feel like me.
403
00:15:41,507 --> 00:15:43,441
Look, Mal, we've come
this far together.
404
00:15:43,575 --> 00:15:45,805
Once you're president,
you can do whatever you want.
405
00:15:45,945 --> 00:15:48,846
But for now, please,
trust me, okay?
406
00:15:50,616 --> 00:15:51,674
- SKIPPY: Alex.
- Hi.
407
00:15:51,817 --> 00:15:53,785
- Hey, where were you guys?
- We went to vote.
408
00:15:53,919 --> 00:15:55,147
Yeah, well, what took so long?
409
00:15:55,287 --> 00:15:56,845
I got stuck in the voting booth.
410
00:15:56,989 --> 00:15:59,014
I couldn't get those little
curtains to open up.
411
00:15:59,158 --> 00:16:02,389
I tried to help him out,
and I got stuck in there myself.
412
00:16:03,729 --> 00:16:05,492
- Hey.
- Hi. How are you?
413
00:16:05,631 --> 00:16:07,565
- Hey. Hey.
- Oh, hi, Nick.
414
00:16:07,700 --> 00:16:10,191
Hey! I, uh, got you these
for good luck.
415
00:16:10,336 --> 00:16:12,099
Oh, thank you. That's sweet.
416
00:16:12,237 --> 00:16:13,568
It was no big deal, you know.
417
00:16:13,706 --> 00:16:14,866
Besides, if you get
elected president,
418
00:16:15,007 --> 00:16:16,998
then I'll be the first lady
of Grant College.
419
00:16:19,445 --> 00:16:22,778
I'm sure they'll use that
in all the brochures.
420
00:16:22,915 --> 00:16:24,940
Hey, uh, nothing
for the campaign manager?
421
00:16:25,084 --> 00:16:27,780
Just this.
422
00:16:27,920 --> 00:16:30,753
No flowers? Nothing?
423
00:16:30,889 --> 00:16:31,878
If you win.
424
00:16:32,024 --> 00:16:33,582
JENNIFER: Alex, quick,
turn on the radio!
425
00:16:33,726 --> 00:16:35,057
They're announcing
the election results!
426
00:16:35,194 --> 00:16:36,889
ELYSE:
Oh!
427
00:16:38,130 --> 00:16:40,189
- STEVEN: Come on, Andy.
- NICK: Hey!
428
00:16:40,332 --> 00:16:41,799
- Nervous, Mal?
- Oh, a little bit,
429
00:16:41,934 --> 00:16:42,901
but I'm excited, too.
430
00:16:43,035 --> 00:16:44,969
- Good luck.
- Thanks.
431
00:16:45,104 --> 00:16:48,073
RADIO ANNOUNCER: This is
WGRW, the voice of Grant College.
432
00:16:48,207 --> 00:16:52,007
Grant College... conveniently
located near all major highways.
433
00:16:52,144 --> 00:16:54,271
Just get to the results.
434
00:16:54,413 --> 00:16:56,404
We don't have
the final totals just yet
435
00:16:56,548 --> 00:16:58,448
in today's student government
presidential election.
436
00:16:58,584 --> 00:17:01,280
Ah, what... what, are you having
trouble counting the votes?
437
00:17:01,420 --> 00:17:03,820
ANNOUNCER: We're having a little
trouble counting the votes.
438
00:17:03,956 --> 00:17:05,583
It's not that
the votes aren't in;
439
00:17:05,724 --> 00:17:08,557
it's just that we're having
trouble counting them.
440
00:17:08,694 --> 00:17:10,321
Well, we finally got this
sorted out!
441
00:17:10,462 --> 00:17:14,865
The new president of
Grant College is Marsha Elkins.
442
00:17:15,000 --> 00:17:16,058
ALL:
What?!
443
00:17:16,201 --> 00:17:18,761
ANNOUNCER:
Marsha Elkins.
444
00:17:18,904 --> 00:17:20,428
(all groan)
445
00:17:23,108 --> 00:17:25,303
Oh, honey, I'm so sorry.
446
00:17:25,444 --> 00:17:27,537
Mal, you were great, really.
You tried...
447
00:17:27,679 --> 00:17:28,907
(murmuring, applause)
448
00:17:29,048 --> 00:17:30,982
Speech! Speech!
449
00:17:32,751 --> 00:17:35,618
Oh. Well, thanks, everybody,
for your support.
450
00:17:35,754 --> 00:17:38,382
You know, you really worked
hard, and it means a lot.
451
00:17:38,524 --> 00:17:40,617
Thanks to everyone
who voted for me,
452
00:17:40,759 --> 00:17:43,592
and thanks to my family
and... and my brother
453
00:17:43,729 --> 00:17:46,163
and campaign manager,
Alex P. Keaton.
454
00:17:46,298 --> 00:17:47,663
STEVEN:
Yeah.
455
00:17:47,800 --> 00:17:50,030
(applause)
456
00:17:50,169 --> 00:17:52,137
He taught me to strive hard
and do my best,
457
00:17:52,271 --> 00:17:54,899
and who, I'm sure, would want me
to be gracious in defeat.
458
00:17:57,476 --> 00:17:59,444
Marsha Elkins...
459
00:17:59,578 --> 00:18:01,637
that idiot!
460
00:18:01,780 --> 00:18:04,943
I demand a recount.
I demand a recount.
461
00:18:09,488 --> 00:18:11,422
I'm sorry you didn't win, Mal.
462
00:18:11,557 --> 00:18:13,115
Oh, thanks.
I'm fine, though.
463
00:18:13,258 --> 00:18:14,520
It's really no big deal.
464
00:18:14,660 --> 00:18:16,184
Oh, that's easy for you to say.
465
00:18:16,328 --> 00:18:17,625
Your mother and I thought
466
00:18:17,763 --> 00:18:19,594
we were finally going
to win an election.
467
00:18:19,731 --> 00:18:23,599
Alex says, "If you want to win,
you have to vote Republican."
468
00:18:23,735 --> 00:18:25,498
Go back to sleep.
469
00:18:25,637 --> 00:18:27,264
ELYSE:
Alex, where were you?
470
00:18:27,406 --> 00:18:29,340
Oh, I was over
at the math department
471
00:18:29,475 --> 00:18:31,340
trying to get the final tally
on the vote.
472
00:18:31,477 --> 00:18:33,570
Took a while because they were
counting on their fingers.
473
00:18:34,713 --> 00:18:37,944
Anyway, uh, they were right.
474
00:18:38,083 --> 00:18:39,812
You lost by 103 votes.
475
00:18:39,952 --> 00:18:41,214
We're proud of you, honey.
476
00:18:41,353 --> 00:18:43,514
Takes a lot of courage
just to run.
477
00:18:43,655 --> 00:18:45,714
And I know
how hard you tried, Mal.
478
00:18:45,858 --> 00:18:47,985
I, uh... I've never
mentioned this before,
479
00:18:48,127 --> 00:18:50,152
but the first time
I ran for president
480
00:18:50,295 --> 00:18:53,162
of the South Campus
Aluminum Can Recycling Club...
481
00:18:53,298 --> 00:18:55,027
I lost.
482
00:18:55,167 --> 00:18:57,431
It was to Warren McCracken.
483
00:18:57,569 --> 00:19:00,470
Uh, the-the interesting thing
about Warren,
484
00:19:00,606 --> 00:19:02,665
he... he had a nose
for aluminum.
485
00:19:02,808 --> 00:19:05,470
He... he could spot
an aluminum can at...
486
00:19:05,611 --> 00:19:07,738
Give it up, Dad.
487
00:19:10,182 --> 00:19:13,379
You know, Mal, this election
is not over by a long shot.
488
00:19:13,519 --> 00:19:16,044
First thing in the morning,
I'm going back to that campus
489
00:19:16,188 --> 00:19:17,951
and I'm going to demand
another recount.
490
00:19:18,090 --> 00:19:19,785
Another recount? Why?
491
00:19:19,925 --> 00:19:21,859
Because, Mal, there were
492
00:19:21,994 --> 00:19:23,962
numerous voting
irregularities there.
493
00:19:24,096 --> 00:19:27,497
I know. I committed them.
494
00:19:27,633 --> 00:19:30,329
Look, Alex, it's over.
495
00:19:30,469 --> 00:19:32,266
I mean, I-I-I ran, I tried hard,
496
00:19:32,404 --> 00:19:35,805
and-and I lost,
and that's it.
497
00:19:37,609 --> 00:19:40,134
Why did you do it?
498
00:19:40,279 --> 00:19:44,340
I mean, why did you suddenly get
so involved with my life?
499
00:19:45,651 --> 00:19:48,211
I don't know, Mal.
I don't know.
500
00:19:48,353 --> 00:19:51,584
I guess, um... I guess I-I...
501
00:19:51,723 --> 00:19:53,452
I just finally saw something
we could do together.
502
00:19:53,592 --> 00:19:54,923
I mean,
something we had in common.
503
00:19:55,060 --> 00:19:57,722
I just... I just wanted to jump
at the chance to do it.
504
00:20:00,299 --> 00:20:02,563
Pretty soon, we're not
going to be living
505
00:20:02,701 --> 00:20:04,828
under the same roof
together anymore.
506
00:20:04,970 --> 00:20:09,566
Are you trying to tell me
that you're moving out?
507
00:20:09,708 --> 00:20:12,006
Don't get too excited, Mal.
508
00:20:12,144 --> 00:20:14,044
I'm trying to be sensitive here.
509
00:20:14,179 --> 00:20:15,203
Oh, sorry.
510
00:20:16,715 --> 00:20:19,946
Anyway, the fact is, um,
pretty soon, we...
511
00:20:20,085 --> 00:20:23,145
we may not be seeing each other
that much.
512
00:20:23,288 --> 00:20:27,691
I mean, uh, I'm going
to graduate, marry Lauren,
513
00:20:27,826 --> 00:20:31,887
get a job on Wall Street,
move to New York.
514
00:20:32,030 --> 00:20:35,932
Well, I'm going to graduate,
marry Nick
515
00:20:36,068 --> 00:20:38,127
and get a job
in the fashion industry
516
00:20:38,270 --> 00:20:40,261
and move to New York.
517
00:20:43,408 --> 00:20:47,469
You aren't going to live uptown,
are you?
518
00:20:47,613 --> 00:20:49,308
Downtown.
519
00:20:49,448 --> 00:20:50,938
- Well, there you go.
- Yeah, right.
520
00:20:51,083 --> 00:20:53,415
We won't be seeing...
521
00:20:53,552 --> 00:20:54,678
Anyway, I just wanted
522
00:20:54,820 --> 00:20:57,380
to make the most of the last
times we have together.
523
00:20:57,522 --> 00:20:59,490
Well, you know,
it's funny, Alex.
524
00:20:59,625 --> 00:21:01,923
Any... any time we try
to do something together,
525
00:21:02,060 --> 00:21:04,153
it turns out to be a disaster.
526
00:21:04,296 --> 00:21:05,957
No. No, that's not true.
527
00:21:06,098 --> 00:21:07,224
That's not true.
528
00:21:07,366 --> 00:21:08,924
We've had some very good times
together.
529
00:21:09,067 --> 00:21:11,058
You remember when we were kids?
530
00:21:11,203 --> 00:21:13,364
Saturday mornings, okay?
531
00:21:13,505 --> 00:21:15,029
Mom and Dad would sleep late.
532
00:21:15,173 --> 00:21:18,506
And we'd come down at 6:30
in the morning in our pajamas.
533
00:21:18,644 --> 00:21:19,668
Right, exactly.
534
00:21:19,811 --> 00:21:21,711
Uh, I was five,
and you were about seven.
535
00:21:21,847 --> 00:21:24,077
Um, I'd start breakfast, and
you'd go down in the driveway
536
00:21:24,216 --> 00:21:26,275
and get the Wa// Street Journa/.
537
00:21:26,418 --> 00:21:29,910
Mom and Dad would always
leave out that box of granola,
538
00:21:30,055 --> 00:21:33,149
- 'cause they didn't want us
to eat sugared cereals. - Right.
539
00:21:33,292 --> 00:21:36,921
We used to go over to Skippy's
and get Fruit Loops.
540
00:21:37,062 --> 00:21:38,791
You'd think they'd notice
541
00:21:38,930 --> 00:21:43,264
we had the same box of granola
for 12 years.
542
00:21:43,402 --> 00:21:45,336
Oh, you know
when else we had fun?
543
00:21:45,470 --> 00:21:47,131
Uh, remember when Mom and Dad
finally decided
544
00:21:47,272 --> 00:21:49,001
we could stay home
without a babysitter?
545
00:21:49,141 --> 00:21:50,699
And we'd make popcorn
and watch TV?
546
00:21:50,842 --> 00:21:53,402
And we were supposed to be
in bed, asleep by 11:00,
547
00:21:53,545 --> 00:21:55,638
and we were too scared
to turn out the lights?
548
00:21:56,682 --> 00:22:00,277
No, I... I wasn't scared.
549
00:22:00,419 --> 00:22:04,014
Alex, you used to cry
until Mom and Dad came home.
550
00:22:04,156 --> 00:22:07,148
I missed them.
551
00:22:10,529 --> 00:22:13,123
So we'd... we'd go up
to my room and talk, and...
552
00:22:13,265 --> 00:22:16,132
and I'd tell you which boys
I liked in school,
553
00:22:16,268 --> 00:22:19,931
and you'd tell me which ones
had the best earning potential.
554
00:22:21,973 --> 00:22:24,999
And look who you wound up with.
555
00:22:25,143 --> 00:22:26,974
Yeah.
556
00:22:27,112 --> 00:22:29,342
We don't talk like that anymore.
557
00:22:29,481 --> 00:22:30,539
It's too bad.
558
00:22:30,682 --> 00:22:33,549
Well, it's an interesting thing,
you know.
559
00:22:33,685 --> 00:22:37,712
I mean... I mean,
I can argue politics with Dad
560
00:22:37,856 --> 00:22:42,759
or, uh, discuss family stuff
with Mom.
561
00:22:42,894 --> 00:22:45,522
Or discuss economics
with Jennifer.
562
00:22:45,664 --> 00:22:48,531
But you... you understand
my emotional side
563
00:22:48,667 --> 00:22:49,929
better than anybody.
564
00:22:50,068 --> 00:22:54,061
Really?
I didn't think you even had one.
565
00:22:54,206 --> 00:22:56,333
Come on.
566
00:22:56,475 --> 00:23:00,275
Remember the night after Ellen
left for Paris?
567
00:23:01,680 --> 00:23:03,477
You stayed up all night,
you know,
568
00:23:03,615 --> 00:23:06,049
talking to me
and listening to me.
569
00:23:06,184 --> 00:23:08,345
You understood.
570
00:23:08,487 --> 00:23:11,945
Well, I'll never forget
those nights
571
00:23:12,090 --> 00:23:14,854
you stayed up trying
to teach me long division.
572
00:23:14,993 --> 00:23:16,085
You got a concussion
573
00:23:16,228 --> 00:23:19,163
from banging your head
against the wall.
574
00:23:20,866 --> 00:23:22,959
I still don't understand it.
575
00:23:25,504 --> 00:23:30,203
You know, I'm going to look back
on life in this house,
576
00:23:30,342 --> 00:23:32,902
and I'm going to remember
those mornings.
577
00:23:34,212 --> 00:23:37,511
And I'm going to remember
the nights babysitting.
578
00:23:37,649 --> 00:23:41,141
And I'm going to
remember tonight.
579
00:23:41,286 --> 00:23:43,982
Me, too.
580
00:23:45,290 --> 00:23:47,850
(Alex grunts)
581
00:23:47,993 --> 00:23:50,291
Sorry about the election, huh?
We'll get 'em next year.
582
00:23:50,429 --> 00:23:52,761
Oh, not a chance.
583
00:23:54,900 --> 00:23:56,390
- I got an idea.
- What?
584
00:23:56,535 --> 00:23:57,797
I have an idea.
585
00:23:57,936 --> 00:24:00,427
Tomorrow morning, we'll wake up
just like we used to.
586
00:24:00,572 --> 00:24:04,440
We come down in our pajamas,
and we make breakfast.
587
00:24:06,378 --> 00:24:08,107
Granola is still here.
588
00:24:36,174 --> 00:24:37,835
MAN:
Sit, Ubu, sit. Good dog.
589
00:24:37,976 --> 00:24:39,136
(Ubu barks)
590
00:24:41,500 --> 00:24:49,500
Ripped By mstoll